A Lesson From Disrespect
Disrespect Builds Walls
We all know the feeling we have after someone disrespects us. It’s awful. I hate the sinking feeling in my stomach. I especially hate it when I believe the criticism leveled at me. Words are powerful and impactful. I realize it every time I see an expression change on someone’s face. Words land in our personal space and then they find a way to creep in like some weird alien movie creature.
I try to avoid disrespectful people or to limit my interaction with them. It’s sad because it builds a wall of distrust between us. It breaks down productive communication until it is worthless.
A Lesson to Resist
I know what disrespect sounds like and feels like, but it took me years to identify it. That statement sounds very contradictory. I didn’t identify it as destructive because I accepted the words. They were just words, right? Wrong!
It’s when I finally felt irritated by someone’s disrespectful and ungrateful view that I finally recognized it as hurtful. It’s not ok to say things in the heat of the moment and then excuse it as such. Words linger, actions create memories, and they persist.
A Lingering Residue
When I was younger and impressionable, I heard disrespect toward me as a flaw in my character. It’s not! Those words ate into my confidence and self-esteem. Surely if I was good enough, smart enough, accomplished enough, they would not be so demeaning toward me.
I am not to blame for the thoughts or lack of compassion from another person.
I Am Enough
So, I learned a valuable lesson from disrespect. It is not about me. It’s about the person who feels the need to spew it. I try hard to not judge them because they are the ones without respect. Besides, I’ve done it.
I am enough. I can’t guarantee that it won’t hurt in the future. I recognize it as a moment where I have a choice. I can respond and fuel the fire or slow my thoughts. Take a breath. If I still feel the need to respond, it will be with grace.