I Am Grateful For My Failures
To fail at anything is awful, sometimes heartbreaking, and always difficult. Over time and hours of reflection, I’ve realized it’s a gift. I’m grateful for my failures because they’ve shaped my successes.
For years I avoided things because I was afraid of failing. I wasted so much time obsessing over it. In my early twenties I worked for a man who used to say that problems were opportunities. It stuck with me but it’s only now that I hear him. Mr. Millhouse was a stubborn man who scared me a little, but I think his resolve was to never give up. At the time, his determination was intimidating.
Failure Felt Like Judgement
I often thought of failure as a metric of my worth. It was embarrassing and, humiliating. I often avoided a repeat of that circumstance like the plague. That’s why it took me so long to write my first book. I worried that if it wasn’t any good, I would be labeled as a bad writer. Since I desperately want to be a good writer, I avoided writing. I was like an ostrich that sticks its head in the sand to avoid danger. If it doesn’t see it, the danger doesn’t exist. If I don’t write the book, no one can judge me.
I’ll be honest, my first book wasn’t a bestseller, but it’s an accomplishment. I wrote many drafts and failed to complete them. Looking back at those unfinished stories now makes me realize that with each one I learned something. With each of those personal failures, I developed a resolve to write again. Maybe a bit of Mr. Millhouse’s stubbornness rubbed off on me.
I’m grateful for those stories that no one will ever read because eventually, I did finish a novel. I published it. It’s out there and I can’t take it back. Some people may judge me for it and may not like it. That’s ok. I didn’t write it for them.
Failure Makes Us Better
When I failed I surrendered and gave failure the victory. I’ve kicked that thought process to the side but like a serpent, it slithers back from time to…